Learning to Lift
by Spygirlie
Summary: Holland shares some words of wisdom with the readers of RayOut. First Fic please be Gentel. I wish that I owned Eureka Seven, but I don't.


It's been a long time since Stoner talked me into writing an article for Ray-Out. I'm not going to lie, I'm not a fan. If it doesn't involve violence or yelling it's not really my thing. However Stoner thinks that the story I have to tell might be inspirational or something and he wasn't about to leave me alone untill I agreed, so here I am.

The only waves I've taken for the last five and a half years have been in an LFO. My board has been gathering dust for two reasons:

1) I got scared; and

2) They don't make band aids for your ego.

The last time that I Lifted I fell. A lot, and doing really simple moves. Really considering the emotional and physical stress that I was under it's not supervising, and it was probably a bad idea to even try that day. I was still recovering from being shot in the leg, I had just started flying the 303 and was still getting use to the additional physical stress that it was causing. We were getting ready to go against the military and to top it all off I was still getting use to the idea of becoming a father. I'm pretty sure that by now you all know my number one rule about lifting. "If your body and or mind is not up to a lift you should go home, have a drink, wax your board and watch a couple episodes of something funny. Don't force a lift, you won't have any fun and you'll end up on your ass.

(For a complete list of my ten rules of Lifting, check the index. Stoner published it somewhere in every issue.)

So I fell, and like everyone, looked really stupid doing it. I began to doubt myself and my ability to Ref without and LFO. Which means that I broke rule number two. "A fall is a tool, each one teaches you something. It is also only one moment in time and in the grand scheme of life means nothing so don't worry about it.

Anyway, that doubt grew over the next year. I think that if I had gone out the next day and lifted I would have been all right, But Gekko State went off to save the planet and we didn't have much time for recreation and my confidence continued to dim. By the time we stopped Dewy, Talho was ready to pop. So it was out of the frying pan and into the fire, I was now responsible to someone as a father.

By the time that life returned to normal, well normal for the Gekko Go, I had spent so much time worrying about falling that my confidence was completely gone and I was scared to even try.

I am not a humble man. In fact Hap will tell you that my ego is bigger than the Gekko. So not only was I scared that I couldn't do it, I was terrified of looking bad to my crew, my friends and my family. I especially didn't want Ami to know that her father was a failure, so my board sat gathering dust.

When Ami was two I taught her the basics of lifting and than sat and watched as Hap and Talho taught her tricks and road the waves with her. It amazes me that she has no fear and that at the age of five she can do a cut back drop turn. And if it weren't for her, my board would still be forgotten.

Since the day she was born Ami had been a Daddy's girl, much to Talho's dismay. Ami trusts me implicitly, if I told her that she could fly, she'd jump off a bridge without a second thought. She is also very smart, to smart for my own good, and even now it's getting harder to trick her so over the last couple weeks she figured out that I was afraid to Lift. She mimicked that and became afraid herself.

It became apparent last night that unless I got on a board again, Ami would never Lift again. I couldn't let that happen. She lives to Ref.

So this morning before dawn Talho gave me a lesson in lifting, in fact it was the exact same lesson I gave here nine years ago, verbatim.

You know what? I fell, and hard. I sprained a wrist and bruised a rib. But by the time the rest of Gekko State joined us after breakfast I was lifting again and by the end of the day I pulled a cut back drop turn. I forgot how amazing it felt on the waves. It was also worth the pain to finally Ref with my little girl.

As far as my ego. I don't know why I was afraid to fall in front of my friends because they were always here waiting to pick me up.

I missed a lot of great waves over the last five years because I was afraid and had an over developed ego. I hope that no one else makes the same mistake.

Holland Novak


End file.
